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Unsplash/Irene Dávila

17 Reasons Why There’s Nothing Like A California Girl

  
chuck henderson
May. 11, 2018
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Unsplash/Irene Dávila

Well, the Beach Boys first brought it to our attention in the ‘60s, David Lee Roth reminded us about it in the ‘80s, Katy Perry weighed in at some point, and so have countless others. The message: California girls are awesome. Of course, most references to California girls are aimed at generalizing Southern California girls, and this list is no exception. Nothing against you NoCal sisters, though. We think you’re pretty great, too. But the women of Southern California are often celebrated for a reason — actually, several reasons, some of which we’ll get into in a minute. First of all, while a lot of the women out here share some common characteristics, each one is unique, and appearances can often be deceiving. If you come here expecting a bunch of bleach-blonde bubbleheads, you’re going to be in for a surprise (and you should probably try to watch fewer Michael Bay movies). That’s not a stereotype that holds up. But let’s talk about some that do.

1. She’s hot.

Let’s get this out of the way first. Everything you’ve heard is true. A lot of hot girls want to be movie stars, so they come here to give it a shot. Sorry, every other state, for taking all your beautiful women. But not really.

2. She’s laid back.

There must be something in the water out here, because people just don’t tend to get worked up too much about anything. Unless the Lakers win the playoffs, then everyone goes butt-fucking crazy and rips the city apart. But the ladies usually sit that kind of thing out.

3. She’s not impressed by celebrities.

If she’s spent any length of time out here, she’s over it. We see them all the time. In line at the grocery store, at the dog park, at the gym. So put away that selfie you took with Will Ferrell. She doesn’t care.

4. She doesn’t wear a lot of clothes.

God bless the California sunshine. When you live somewhere that’s always warm and sunny, there’s not a lot of call for things like sleeves or long pants.

5. She’s open-minded.

With the exception of Orange County, California is pretty liberal from top to bottom. Some of the red states accuse of us of being godless heathens with no moral code, but we just call it living. If it isn’t hurting anybody, she’s probably up for it.

6. She’s friendly.

A California girl is always willing to give you a smile or say hello on the street. This, however, does not necessarily mean she wants to have sex with you. There has been some confusion over this in the past.

7. She loves the outdoors.

It hardly ever rains in Southern California, and we have the drought to prove it. On the upside, there’s not a lot of call for staying indoors at any time of the year. It’s not rare that a California girl has been to the beach, gone sailing, skiing, and taken a hike in the mountains — all in one day.

8. She’s healthy.

Staying healthy is big out here, and a lot of California girls take it seriously. She watches what she eats and she keeps it tight.

9. She knows her shit.

There are a lot of good schools out here on the west coast. A lot of women come out here for the education and stay for the weather. Just because she’s beautiful doesn’t mean she’s dumb.

10. She cares about the environment.

Recycling, conserving fuel, living green and reducing your carbon footprint is part of the culture out here. Throw an aluminum can in the trash or show up at a grocery store without your own bags and you’ll lose points with her.

11. She’s ambitious.

There’s a lot of glamour out here, and most people want some of it for themselves. Just because she’s laid back and friendly doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to accomplish real things with her life.

12. She’s a good driver.

Since it’s impossible to get around this state without your own wheels, and we have arguably the most challenging traffic in the country, becoming a good driver is essential (NOTE: “good” does not necessarily mean “safe”).

13. She’s a foodie.

Yeah, just because she eats healthy doesn’t mean she doesn’t like her food. Most California girls are obsessed with Sushi, Pho, real Mexican, and yes, the occasional In-N-Out burger.

14. She will call you on your bullshit.

When you live in one of the fakest places in the world, you learn to spot bullshit from a mile away. Keep it real with her.

15. She’s passionate.

Don’t know the reason for this one, but California women tend to have very strong feelings and opinions about things, whether it’s art, politics, or charitable causes.

16. She’s accepting of other cultures.

California is diverse, and because it’s also so liberal, racism doesn’t fly here. Showing bias against any group of people is a real turnoff to a California girl.

17. She’s great in bed.

This is one of those stereotypes that has no foundation to support it, other than the way California girls have been hyper-sexualized over the years. Still, it’s one of those “good” stereotypes, so let’s keep perpetuating it.

  
chuck henderson
May. 11, 2018

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